So… the Vishay TSOP4838 IR receiver does work with the OSSC if you bend a couple of legs over. It’s cheap and available everywhere, it will do for now.
With menu access I can now switch output mode from HDMI to DVI and I get the test pattern on my monitor. My SNES also works well but has some periodic noise that isn’t in the test card image, I’m guessing that’s from the cheap switching power supply.
I’m pretty happy, thanks for the help.